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Poetry
TAIL
By patterjack
11 May 2007
for  those  who  prefer  to  review  narrative rather  than  lyrical  verse


                                            Tail                 
 
                                          Part  1

The   wind  was  an  icy  needle  blowing  through  the fence's  cracks
The  moon was   palely fading   behind  the  thin clouds'  backs
The path  from the  gate was slippery to  every delicate  paw
When  the  old  tom  cat   came  pacing  --
            Pacing -- pacing
The old tom cat came  pacing , up  to the  closed  back  door .

He'd an eyelid drooping downwards , where in  fights it had been torn ,
And  parts of his fur were missing  as  if  it had  been  shorn
A half of  an  ear had  been  ripped  off  by another  moggy's rage
             But he moved  with  feline cunning ,
             All other felines shunning 
Slinking sly and never  running -- secure  on  his  chosen  stage .


He  sat  on  the  backyard  doorstep  ,  next  to  the garbage  can,
He  raised  his  head  and  looked  around , his  narrow   kingdom   to  scan,
He  rumbled  deep within  his  chest  , with  much more  than a purr,
           And scratched  behind the untorn ear
           Scratched with a  sort  of   feline  leer
Shedding upon  his  doorstep seat still  heavier hanks  of  fur .


From  further  up  the  alleyway  there  came a kind  of  clang.
Someone further along  there lidded  a bin  with a mighty  bang
And  cats  from  around  the  block slunk near , in  hopes  of a  fruitful spill,
      Slunk   up  the alley with  raucous  howls
      Slunk up with   tuneless  warning  yowls !
To  tell all  the  other  cats  * Make  way for  me  !     Untll  I've  had  my  fill  *


On the stoop the old cat stopped his scratch because he thought he'd  heard
Some thing  within  the  garbage can ,  a  thing  that  slithered and  stirred 
He fixed  his  good  eye on  the  bin , to check on the half  fixed lid
      Part closed   it began  to  gently  rock  , 
      Part open  it  swung  like a pendulum  clock
If he  leapt upon it , it  might  fall , and  show  what  the  contents  hid  .


                                             Part  2

Far from the safety of  his  native element  and lost to  all his friends ,
Unable  now  to call  upon  the strength  that  friendship lends,
Unable  to  call  upon  anyone as one  who might give  him aid , 
    Thinking  of   seas  in  the  moonlight ,
    Sweet  waves  of  the sea  in the moonlight  ,
He  crouched  in  the  darkness there alone , helpless  and  afraid . 

                    
Bent almost  double  now  and  twisted  , his  struggles growing  weaker,
He  knew  that  out  in  the cold  moonlight there waited a  deadly seeker , 
One  waiting   till  he  was  frail  enough   for an  easy  chance  to leap  .
      And he  dreamed   of  the  chances   that  had   gone
      A lifetime  of  chances  that  had  gone
To end now forever for  him in  deaths 's long  silent sleep.


He  heard   the  caterwauling   as  the  alley  cats  screeched  and  fought
And  now  he  regretted  deeply  the  dark  refuge   he had   sought,
For  the  lid  rattling  loose above  him betrayed  him  as  he quivered  .
    So he  tucked  his  tail  beneath  himself,
    His  silvered   tail  beneath  himself .
And  with  silver  tail  around  himself the  terrified  Merman  shivered,


Reviews

Written by Lizzy (800 comments posted) 11th May 2007
What a wonderful description of a cat, you can feel its evil. 
Macavity meets the Highwayman I felt. 
Part 2 put across his fear very well. 
Lizzy
TAIL
Written by CliffBowes (176 comments posted) 11th May 2007
Very reminiscent of Alfred Noyes had he collaborated with TS Eliot - but nevertheless an original approach to my pet hate - cats. I hate the way they creep into my garden and hook my fish out of the pond leaving them to die and then go on to decimate the wild bird population. Often I find a beheaded chaffinch or blue tit on the lawn. Why can't they stay within their own back yards? 
Now I will be on the lookout for a badly mauled mermaid. 
I did really like the poem, it was well written and up to the high standard that you have set yourself on this site. Many thanks Brian 
Cliff

Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3362 comments posted) 11th May 2007
I did like this. I do remember "The Highway man" but much preferred this one; not just because the subject matter is easier to relate to but because of your abitlity to put us in the mind of that cat. And I have to say I didn't think the cat evil at all, in fact I felt sympathty towards it. How can something be evil if it doesn't have a choice? 
You've borrowed from a poem and actually written something better,for me at least. I'ts something I can really appreciate. 
Incidentally,you say this is lyrical rather than narrative. I can see the narrative thread in this but it has a lyrical flow to it too. And don't song "lyrics" usually tell a story? I'm not sure I can see the difference [without resorting to the dictionary and that's just definition with no room for interpretation. It's a bit of a minefield 
cheers 
Jane
I love it and so does my cat
Written by AnnieSeed (128 comments posted) 11th May 2007
I spotted the echoes of The Highwayman straightaway - it's one of my favourites, and this one is brilliant too. I was half expecting a feline lady love to be waiting to give her life for the old tompuss. Very evocative and atmospheric and I agree the cat wasn't evil. If I'm honest I have to say I think whatever cats do is no worse than humans do, unfortunately. Sorry, Cliff! :)
HI Brian
Written by jean.day (2283 comments posted) 11th May 2007
Wonderful poem, but I'm with Cliff in not caring that much about the cat. It's the merman that gets my sympathy.

Written by patterjack (1196 comments posted) 11th May 2007
The reason for the mention of lyrical in the intro was a sort of side comment : re where one reviewer of another poem seemed to me to confuse a lyrical poem as being one that merely rhymed , rather than one in free verse
 
I tend to look on lyrics in poetry as being songs rather than poems with plotted stories . The really perfect one of them is O Mistress Mine by the consummate lyricist William S. 
 
The term has been bastardised however by Tin Pan Alley.  
 
It is possible to have lyrical moments in narrative verse of course. 
 
Thanks to all reviewers -- aileurophile or aileurophobe !  
 
And apologies to lovers of The Highwayman  
 
patterjack
Phil Ochs RIP
Written by strawberryshrapnel (61 comments posted) 5th June 2007
Its Bootiful! 
SS
I confess ...
Written by patterjack (1196 comments posted) 5th June 2007
... to never having heard of the gentleman mentioned. 
 
I am ambivalent about whether you were being complimentary -- if you were , thank you , if not , no sweat for me . 
 
I googled him up to work out any hidden agenda in the comment -- and must say , that though I am fond of a drink , I do not have his affinity for the bottle-- nor am I manic depressive -- and having survived thus far for 78 years I have no intention of committing suicide now . 
 
Thank you for your interest and the comment . 
 
patterjack
belated .........
Written by Bagheera (683 comments posted) 6th June 2007
 
..... I recognised this when I opened it up, I remember reading it when it was first posted and can't imagine how I neglected to chip in with a comment at the time :sigh Sorry!! 
 
I thought from the start that it captured the feline spirit immediately - your cat could easily have been related to "The Christmas Cat" I wrote of months ago in the Non-fiction section! :grin  
 
The "twist" to introduce the merman in the second half was a masterstroke, brilliantly executed. Thanks again, Brian, for a piece well worth coming back to! 8)

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