I parked the car in a turn-around just off the highway. Slowly I got out wondering if I had it in me to do this after so many years. I looked down the highway avoiding looking at the butte. I popped the trunk and began to dig out my hiking gear. I couldn’t remember how many times I had been out here with Travis. We ran wild in those days. After getting my gear set I locked up the car and headed towards Saddle Rock butte.

I kept my eyes on the ground in front of leery of rattlesnakes and my mind wandered back 14 years. I had always been an outcast in Crawford and so I just naturally ran with the other outcasts. Travis Olbricht was the wildest out of all of us. He was fearless and a little crazy I thought. We were usually together running out on the family ranch or running around town doing things most sane people would think twice about doing. That was some of the best times in my life.

I had forgotten how steep it was up to the butte I was already on my second break and I still had quite a ways to go. I need to stop smoking I told myself for the fortieth time that day.

Finally at the base of the butte I stopped for a breather and looked at all the small rodent bones. A lot of birds make their nests in the many holes of the butte and they seem to just toss the bones once they are stripped clean. I found a skull of a field mouse and I took a picture of it. Finally my breath had returned so I started for the top hoping nothing crumbled under my feet.

“It’s about time you got up here I thought I was going to have to help you up.”

Travis didn’t seem to look any different to me. Same old long hair and that same old cocky smile. I sat facing the town we had conquered when we were kids.

“Hey it has been quite a few years since I have done this.” I said defensively with a smile.

“Yeah well I am always up here.” Travis stated.

“Yeah I heard that from some of the old outcasts. George, Mike, and Joe have not changed any.”

“How come you have not come to see me?” Travis asked in a hurt tone.

I sat silently for a while looking out trying to find an answer.

“I just didn’t want to say goodbye Travis” I said as I slowly turned. My eyes went to the white flag that marked the spot where Mike had scattered Travis’s ashes. Slowly Travis faded away and I was left alone. Travis had died seven years ago and I still had not let go until now.

Goodbye Travis.