Merely an observation on how people behave.... A housewife hanging out the sheets,A policeman meandering along his beat,
Children playing in the street,
A picture of the world at ease.
Bonnet up, man repairs his motor,
A family walking, man, wife and daughter,
Hedges trimmed, lawns clipped shorter,
An image of the world at peace.
Then,
The honking is heard, and every eye,
Is raised up, all heads towards the sky,
All tasks forgotten, let them lie,
As the whole world stops for a flight of geese|
Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 21st June 2007 | | Aaah, excellent | Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 21st June 2007 | | Aaah, excellent | Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 21st June 2007 | | There's a nice simplicity to this piece. I can't imagine a street stopping to look at a flock of geese though, was this written from experience? | Written by goingtothedogs (58 comments posted) 21st June 2007 | Oh yes. and I've seen it more than once. As they come honking over in their V formation, people stop and look. It doesn't last long, but it does happen. Or perhaps geese are muc more common near you and they don't attract attention? | Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 22nd June 2007 | Well it's good that people are still stopping to "smell the roses". Perhaps geese are more common here, or perhaps people are just too caught up in their busy London lives to notice! I'll stop clogging up your reviews now... | Written by goingtothedogs (58 comments posted) 22nd June 2007 | Yes we should stop. and there's a famous piece that put it far better than i have here....... What is this life if full of care We have no time to stand and stare? No time to stand beneath the boughs And stare as long as sheep, or cows. No time to see, when woods we pass, Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass. No time to see, in broad daylight, Streams full of stars, like skies at night. No time to turn at Beauty's glance, And watch her feet, how they can dance. No time to wait till her mouth can Enrich that smile her eyes began. A poor life this, if full of care, We have no time to stand and stare. William Henry Davies 1871 - 1940
| Written by ellyb39 (79 comments posted) 23rd June 2007 | | you have really managed to catch the moment out of the 'norm' when we all get a reminder of the natural world. thought the poem was well written and the rhyming natural and appropriate. elly | "Flight" of geese? Written by Talisker (1326 comments posted) 23rd June 2007 | Ah! I think it stretches artistic license to invent new collective nouns! "Gaggle" or "Flock" (on the ground) "Skein", "team" or (my fave) "wedge" in the air "Plump" of geese on water Nice inspiration - not quite consummated for me. Oli | Written by goingtothedogs (58 comments posted) 23rd June 2007 | Is a "flight" of geese not an "allowed" word? It never occured to me to question it. it seemed so obvious to me.... | Written by stevetroster (1549 comments posted) 24th June 2007 | Flight? Perfectly legit, unless you are a pedantic poet who struggles for a positive word to say. I feel that option six is the one that you want. flight [flīt] 1. process or act of flying: the process or act of moving through the air or through space 2. air trip: a trip through air or space in a form of transport daily flights of a thousand miles or more 3. scheduled flight: a scheduled flight with a commercial airline, usually designated by letters and numbers flight TC546 to Vancouver 4. ability to fly: the ability to travel through the air with wings an experimental ultralight tested for flight an ancient bird incapable of flight 5. building series of steps between floors: a group of stairs that go from one level of a building to another We live three flights up. 6. group flying together: a group of aircraft or birds flying together, sometimes in a set pattern 7. air force group of military aircraft: a group of aircraft in the U.S. Air Force that forms a subdivision of a squadron 8. rapid movement: swift passage, progress, or motion, especially through the air 9. extraordinary mental feat: an act or the process of imagining extraordinary things flights of the imagination 10. tail of arrow or dart: the feathers on an arrow or dart v (past flight·ed, past participle flight·ed, present participle flight·ing, 3rd person present singular flights) 1. vi fly together: to fly or migrate together Encarta ® World English Dictionary © & (P) 1998-2004. Should you wish to humour the poets; The honking is heard, and every eye Is raised up, all heads towards the sky, All tasks forgotten, let them lie, As the whole world stops to watch geese fly. Best wishes Steve. | Written by goingtothedogs (58 comments posted) 24th June 2007 | "The honking is heard, and every eye Is raised up, all heads towards the sky, All tasks forgotten, let them lie, As the whole world stops to watch geese fly." Yeah I like that | Geese Written by CliffBowes (176 comments posted) 25th June 2007 | A very nicely constructed, descriptive work. I like it very much. I think that you can get away with flight, as in your original version. It does follow the last line rhyme pattern of the other verses. I think that the revised last line is a bit clumsy with all the lines of the verse rhyming. It is difficult not to look up and stare as a 'flight' of geese fly overhead, mainly because of the damned racket they kick up. Much the same with the RAF Tornados from Leeming air station when they fly over. | Geese Written by CliffBowes (176 comments posted) 25th June 2007 | A very nicely constructed, descriptive work. I like it very much. I think that you can get away with flight, as in your original version. It does follow the last line rhyme pattern of the other verses. I think that the revised last line is a bit clumsy with all the lines of the verse rhyming. It is difficult not to look up and stare as a 'flight' of geese fly overhead, mainly because of the damned racket they kick up. Much the same with the RAF Tornados from Leeming air station when they fly over. |
Only registered users can rate and write comments. Please login or register. Powered by AkoComment 2.0! |