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Jewels for Jules (1)

By Talisker

26 June 2007

We wandered in a Shangri-la

of foxgloves and cow mumbles

and lay upon the meadowsweet

with dragonflies and ladybirds

forgot the world for just a while

a careless moment in the sun

lips met lips in tenderness

near Gorran’s gentle haven

in my luminous dream

Oli 26/06/07

Reviews

Written by Phil (6675 comments posted) 26th June 2007

Crikey Oli, you must be losing it. Dreaming of being in England? (Gorran Haven is in Cornwall isn't it?) Love does funny things to you.

Warm and gentle. It has a turn of the century feel to it. (1900) Liked it very much. Last line, nothing wrong with it, but is it needed?

Hope your jewel is warmed by it.

Phil

Last line...
Written by Talisker (1326 comments posted) 26th June 2007

it is personal Phil - but I felt it important to emphasise that it is a dream - luminous was the right adjective for me.

You're right that it does seem superflous to the verse, except to define its legitimacy for the writer - but it stays!

Many thanks for the kind words,

Oli

Written by Lizzy (790 comments posted) 26th June 2007

I thought this was lovely.
I wish my other half was poetic and could write such things for me. (Sighs!!!)
Lizzy

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