Not waving but drowning.
Prince Charles is to visit flood hit areas around Gloucestershire today. Using his Highgrove mansion as a base he will travel in Andrew's rubber dinghy to Tewksbury to give his support to his near neighbours.
Highgrove, situated close to flooded areas, has remained unaffected by recent downpours. A lack of sand bags meant the royal couple's serfs had to form a human barrier to the rising waters. Lying head to toe, three deep, they stemmed the water's flow at the steps of Charles and Camilla's country residence.
‘It was perfectly frightful,' whinnied Camilla. ‘The smell of damp clothes got everywhere. But they didn't stop waving for us for...well...minutes.'
In a separate development, famed Yorkshire boat builder, Noah Arkwright has been recaptured while raiding Barnsley Children's Zoo.
In a statement to the press, he said: ‘Ah notice t'inbred dint visit us.'
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Written by wltshr (314 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Nice gentle stuff!
Anne lives even closer but you left her alone. You must be going soft.
BTW How many Barnsley children do they keep at the zoo? Presumably, Mr Arkwright only wanted two of them.
Best
Wltshr |
Written by hutmaster (134 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Extremely well paced and handled piece of fun-poking, Phil and the title is well thought out.
I think this Noah Arkwright character might have more mileage in him yet this so-called Summer.
hm |
Written by Livinginanattic (456 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Good fun this. I like the way you had Camilla complaining to the last.
Ben |
Written by Lizzy (800 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Well done, enjoyed this.
More from Noah Arkwright please
Lizzy |
Written by Seagull (174 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
You'd think the poor folk of Gloucester had suffered enough; first Bully Brown, and now, the future King & Queen! God bless their souls!!
Sir C Gull. |
Written by Fledermaus (3301 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Indeed. Noah Arkwright seems cool. You could do a shortstory on him.
Strange job those royals and presidents have. Hopping over to disaster struck places and tell the people how deeply sorry they are. They are mainly waisting time, but then, if they don't (like Vladimir Putin once or twice), people start complaining that they don't care... |
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3362 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
I wondered if there was any mileage in that news item, Phil. I decided there wasn't. It seems I was wrong.A great piece of understated pig-sticking.I'm quite prepared to believe you got Camilla dead exactly right. Always happy to see you sticking it to the royals, you do it so well. I also liked Arkwright, hope to see more of him.
Someone please tell Fledermaus that is what the royals
re for,whatever they do has got to be wrong. I mean that wasn't a note of sympathy I detected there was it??
cheers
Jane |
Written by givitsum (651 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Well done Phil. Once again the Royals kop one from your keyboard. Do you really saunter about all day dreaming up new ways to ridicule them??
"...and in other news, 53 people were killed in Kabul when a suicide bomber drove his car into a busy market and blew it up. Nobody has yet claimed responsibility for the attack, but a bloke in from Bolton gave us an unconfirmed report that the British Royal family may have been behind the atrocity..."
Keep up the good work,
Givitsum |
Written by Phil (6730 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
Thanks for reading and commenting.
They tee them up Chris, I just hit them.
Phil. |
Written by philkent (157 comments posted) 27th July 2007 |
| Cammie whinnying had me laughing, liked the fact Arkwright had a cameo in this. Satire bordering on the wonderfully absurd. |
Written by gshelme (152 comments posted) 29th July 2007 |
I enjoyed this,very gentle indeed, I too would like to see more on Arkwright.
Are you concerned about this blue stuff overhead, can't think what it could be!
Gill  |
Written by Superbox (5 comments posted) 8th August 2007 |
| A well structured piece,with plenty of snippits of humour.A gentle read,but the piece would gain more edge with more on the comedy front. |
Written by smidge (9 comments posted) 17th August 2007 |
| Really enjoyed the poke at Charles and Camilla, nice sense of humour. |
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