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* In the interests of fairness, please do not post more than 3 pieces of your own work at any one time.
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Local Advertising

Postby Messiah » Sun Jun 17, 2012 1:41 pm

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Last edited by Messiah on Sat Jul 21, 2012 7:59 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: GW Board Game

Postby Keith exD » Sun Jun 17, 2012 2:08 pm

YOU COULD COP FOR THOUSANDS!!!!!!!

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REMEMBER: If you don't take up this offer you may be contacted up to 25 times a day between the hours of 01.00-06.00 or 17.00-23.59 by Hindi speaking computers
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Staff Notice Board

Postby Messiah » Tue Jun 26, 2012 12:32 pm

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*

ADVERTISMENT

Can't face the HORROR of posting your latest masterpiece?
Is finding the right forum proving to be a NIGHTMARE?
Concerned about the GRAVE consequences of vamp ire?

Let Bardmoan and Grievance take the strain?
We specialise in finding the right home for all first-time posters. And you can rest assured that all our forums are as safe as safe can be: Only nineteen cases of recorded crime in the last 14 months!
So, pick up that phone and call Bardmoan and Grievance today.
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*

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Last edited by Messiah on Sat Jul 21, 2012 7:58 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Lottery Tickets

Postby Messiah » Fri Jun 29, 2012 5:26 pm

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New GW Lottery Tickets

Just scratch and sniff: And you too could be the recipient of a pointless critique!
PLUS... 5 lucky winners will get their very own deleted post.
And remember... All critiques are now guaranteed 100% inane or ambiguous.

GW Lottery Tickets: Buy one today!
50% of all proceeds go towards the re-siting of once-active members.


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Messiah
 
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Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:00 pm

Now Showing

Postby Messiah » Fri Jun 29, 2012 5:35 pm

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NOW SHOWING

The Lesser Ryeting Multiperplexed Cinematorium Proudly Presents:

Hatman & Dobbin (The Movie)


Banana na-na na-na na-na, na-na na-na na-na na-na, Hatman!

SCENE 27:

'riddle me , this .. hatman ,' cackled The Stoker. 'When is , a mod, not a , mod?'
'That's easy,' declared the dynamic Hatman's erstwhile sidekick, Dobbin, the lady-boy wonder. 'When it's a Paul Well—'
'No, old chump,' cut in Hatman. 'When it's a ''mods''.
'Holy plurals, Hatman! However did you crack that nut?'
'Simples, Dick: The Stoker always leaves ambiguous clues to his crimal acts: I simply put two and too together and came up with a tutu.'
'Holy nutcracker suite!'
'your two , smart four .. me, ' sobbed The Stoker. 'slap on .. the , cuffs and , haul me bach , too arkham ass I.Lum. But .. re member .. this , hatman: their are other crim .. inals hear. If ewe don't , like my cry.mz , make shore ewe , point it .. ought two them.'
'I would if I knew who they were,' replied Hatman. 'They all wear masks.'
'Oh, pur-leeeease!' squealed Dobbin. 'Was Winston Smith a Prole?!'
'What! Another one? They must be breeding! Quick, Dobbin, put in a call to GW HQ: Tell them to send Arnie.'
'But... Hatman... You can't mean...'
'Yes, Dobbin: Tell them to send... The Moderator!'
'Holy string vests, Hatman! If only The Penguin were here; we could have a pecking party.'
'If only Peckinpah was here; we could be in a decent movie!'

WHAT'S THIS? THE THREAT OF MODERATION?
IT WOULD CERTAINLY BE A FIRST!
BUT WORSE... MODERATORS MODERATING MODERATORS!
MODO E MODO!


Tune in next week, Hatfans – same time, same place – and witness the Amazing Didicoy skinned alive by the evil Russian criminal ''Moonshine Sam''.



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Messiah
 
Posts: 39
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:00 pm

Re: GW Board Game

Postby Keith exD » Fri Jun 29, 2012 5:45 pm

ROLL UP ROLL UP JOIN THE MESSIAH AT 19.00 AND PLACE YOUR BETS ON HOW FAR KEITH-THE-DON CAN SPIT HIS DUMMY.
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Re: GW Board Game

Postby Sooz » Fri Jun 29, 2012 6:42 pm

Ouch! Harsh. This is great, really clever. And I daren't gush because you'll think I'm...Advance to Nearest Bumped Post and pay owner twice the complement to which he/she is otherwise entitled. If Post is Dross, you may Lie Unreservedly.... which I@m not. Really enjoyed this.
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Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2012 5:52 pm

Amatuer Poetry Corner

Postby Messiah » Fri Jul 20, 2012 12:51 pm

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The Great Culling


O, how I remember the great membership cull
of summer twenty-twelve:
admin, scything down bards young and old.
Rapidly, membership fell.

But, oh, how I miss that non-poster from Hull
and the girl whose books stayed in her mind.
I did not read the non-works of XTC-gull,
but still left them critiques most unkind.

I remember quite clearly the membership cull:
it was sunny, or maybe it rained.
But, whatever the weather, I know that, together,
we'll clog up the forums again.

Onward we write, now six hundred and more,
in belief that the culling was just,
standing shoulder-to-shoulder at our open door,
with our motto of ''In Mods We Trust''.

And should we be culled from six hundred to sixty,
I'll raise up my glass in a toast
and recall all the non-posts that I miss the most
from the host of our Great Writing ghosts.

O, how I remember the membership cull.
Summer. Twenty-twelve.
It rained. It snowed. The wind did blow.
Ah, yes, I remember it well!


*


Onward they wrote, the strange six hundred,
Into the volumes of dearth.

— Albert ''Lard'' Tiresome.


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Last edited by Messiah on Sat Jul 21, 2012 5:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Messiah
 
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Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:00 pm

In Memoriam

Postby Messiah » Sat Jul 21, 2012 5:26 pm

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The Last Visited

Angypangy: July 2011 - Posts 0
Deskjet850: July 2011 - Posts 0
Charlieriver: July 2011 - Posts 0
Lahamilton: July 2011 - Posts 0
KSOM: July 2011 - Posts 0
A.S.Yates: July 2011 - Posts 0
R.C.: July 2011 - Posts 0
Eva148: July 2011 - Posts 0
Jill the Ripper: July 2011 - Posts 0
Tantamount: July 2011 - Posts 0
Martin: July 2011 - Posts 0
Amethyst: July 2011 - Posts 0
Scribo: July 2011 - Posts 0
GoingBlue: July 2011 - Posts 0
Swk2000: July 2011 - Posts 0
Dreamgirl: July 2011 - Posts 0
Alivepublishing: July 2011 - Posts 0
Mac the cat: July 2011 - Posts 0
Jen1977: July 2011 - Posts 0
ForgottenApple: July 2011 - Posts 0
Cerberus: July 2011 - Posts 0
Noorrathore: July 2011 - Posts 0
Btmitchell: July 2011 - Posts 0
BusterSpleen: July 2011 - Posts 0
MaestraMarisa: July 2011 - Posts 0
Jacqui: July 2011 - Posts 0
Psgd: July 2011 - Posts 0
Craven: July 2011 - Posts 0
Samanthajo: July 2011 - Posts 0
Trimotor: July 2011 - Posts 0
Gooner1: July 2011 - Posts 0
Nomad Collapse: July 2011 - Posts 0
Shelley: July 2011 - Posts 0

Etcetra.

And that's from just the first eight(8) member pages.

July 2011.
Ah, yes, I remember it well!
GW were running a ''Sign Up Get One Free'' promotion.
One has to admit that it was huge success!


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Writing for an audience of one.
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Messiah
 
Posts: 39
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:00 pm

Poetry Corner

Postby Messiah » Sat Jul 21, 2012 5:32 pm

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In Memoriam

Great Writing's where my tale begins:
With all the many wordsmiths here
Who publish works which they hold dear
And place their faith in site admins

— A love of Mods is love sincere!
When Penny posted prose, unchecked,
She really got it in the neck
And threw herself off of a peer.

Pete-Pan, a man of fear and doubt,
Posted not a single story:
Zero, is the inventoried
Nothings that this sub-scribe poured out.

His empty vessel slowly sank.
A passing stranger, best forgot,
I look at what he published, not,
And wonder why he joined our ranks.

So, keep your words: for what are you?
A fledgeling bard, who does not write,
Whose member ship sinks out of site!
I bid all absentees ''adieu''.

Wilfred ''Gawd!'' Troublesome.


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-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Writing for an audience of one.
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Messiah
 
Posts: 39
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:00 pm

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